thejonranhuff

The abyss, ever growing, The truth, never showing, My life, ever going, My love, never knowing, In truth, ever doting, In death, never sewing.

The paper heart inside my chest, It never quite beats its best, It only mimics what it knows to do, Like love, affection, and prepare to lose, Always defending, Pain never ending, Pull it out to discover it's stopped, All that remains from my personal drop, Look deep inside to find out what I hide, The fact that this heart masks the fact that I've died.

You can try to get to me, I wouldn't advise it, The road is filled with peril, To both malicious and pure intent, Many have tried, Few get far, The ones that do, Only make the road more perilous, You can't make it here, The sinking sand of doubt, Is going to drown you out, Still not disuaded? I can't believe your persistence, Well, good luck, The thorns of the past, They'll surely scare you away, The road is riddled with them, You're still on your way? This must be a fluke, You're just like the rest, You'll find a way to hurt me, But you're getting awful close, Why have I let you this close? There's one last barrier, A literal one at that,

The mask that I wear to protect me from harm, Is glued to my face, a permanent charm, I'm not who I've become, but who is to blame? I hid from their contempt til we were one and the same, I now feel more lost than perhaps ever before, The mask, now my face, from which tears now pour, Who would have known that hiding all these years, Would force me to realize my darkest of fears? I spent so much time on who I was supposed to be, That the real me is lost to never again be seen.

In the grand scheme, I'm not all that much, I'm little to nothing, Brittle to the touch, A twig from a branch, from a tree in a forest, In truth, you'll forget me, Time will ensure that, Futile to fight it, I know where I'm at, I guess we're all born to some day fade away.

As I walk through the flames once more, I think of the path that leads to the door, A door long shut, but I now hold the key, As I draw ever closer, a pain swells in me, What lies in wait on the other side of here? Deliverance from the flames or even more tears? I question it so, and my feet grow yet cold, This pain and this sadness have all but grown old, The flames I grew tolerance, I hide the pain well, Though deep inside, I'm burning in Hell, But fear of what's there, keeps me at an arms length, Until I grow ever stronger and muster the strength, When that day arrives, what will I see? Will I find all my friends that I've lost in Hell's

You were there, I remember you, We were there, Together, Something forgotten, Yet so easily recalled, The feeling I lost, The strength I feigned, Taken for granted, No more, You're gone, I remember you, The smiles, Played up to hide the pain, Inside a storm raged, But we smiled, Because together we were, Now we are no more, But I remember you, The time we wasted, Laughing at nothing, Forgetting our troubles, I miss you so, I think of you less and less, And that thought, It scares me, I remember you now, But now and forever, You're a fading memory, Fading so fast, How long will it be, Before you fade into nothing?

My heart, In a box, Who holds the key? No one knows, I carry it along, Waiting and waiting, For her to open it, Accept my love, Unlock the box, Let me show you, Show how it feels, The feeling of love, And to be loved in return, Not simply infatuation, But love, True and honest, Waiting patiently, Yet so impatiently, For you to open the box...

It's hard to believe, and it happened so fast, The love that we have, I want it to last, We're both scarred so deep, clinging to anything real, Defenses so high, we just want to feel, To feel we are wanted and to feel someone cares, It's all we can ask for, but love isn't fair, I love you so truly, I love you so deep, I gave you my heart, and it is yours to keep, I hope someday soon, you'll be wrapped in my arms, I'll hug you and kiss you and keep you from harm, The danger is real and the risk factor high, To trust and to let in, to watch yourself die, But never in my life would I hurt you, my dear, It is these words most that I want you to

I am not one of you, I am not your kind, I was born weaker, I was made inferior, Pain hits me so hard, Harder than you could know, If you feel like me, If you're weak and tired, A hand I reach, I wish to help, But know I can't do much, Inferior in every way, Less than who they are, I wonder if they'd look, Look if I would disappear, Would they bat an eye? Would  they shed a tear? I do not know, Life all alone, Is no life at all...